Difficult…

…a d word in passing.

It is about 11pm as I sit down to write this post. Once again the mission to 26 alphabetical posts has pointed me in many directions. Dreamer, decade, dutiful, daughter, dolls; all d words and posts that were started, but now cast aside.  This will be a challenging post to write as my head is pounding and my eyes are drooping.

My sister, the Irish Twin died today, 68 years young.

My d words will not feature bolded font for the Irish Twin used to be the bold one. Sadly, in the last 8 years we lived a little over a mile apart, but may as well have been living on opposite ends of the continent. It is not that we had a falling out of any kind; it was a complicated relationship.

I have many wonderful memories of the Irish Twin as well as some family tales (mostly true*) of tumultuous times. The photo below was featured in a post about my mother, but I doubt she ever read it. (See asterisk above) I mentioned the blog to her, but sometimes I think looking back was just too difficult.

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The Irish Twin is in the striped sweater. Keary in the red sweater re-posted this photo on Facebook for National Siblings Day. The Irish Twin was none too pleased. 

I have to admit it is not the most flattering, but if you knew her this would speak volumes. Her own sons admitted to me today that indeed the above photo captured her essence.

My nephews lost their Dad last August, so as Father’s Day approaches, they will now include their Mom. One of her sons is married and has two young children. They will miss their “Mimi”. The Irish Twin was a frequent sitter.

A few photos from past posts…

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Easter, sometime before I was born. Boston Commons. The Irish Twin is standing behind two of my brothers.

 

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Exactly one year ago, the Irish Twin (watch and black purse) goes out to dinner with us when several of our siblings come to town.

The Family Matriarch has asked me to write the eulogy for my sister. Since the letter e would be my next post, it seems the timing was set in fate. As the unofficial family historian, I hope to portray a woman who took risks we wished she hadn’t, moved far away too many times, wore her emotions on her sleeve while shouting them from her mouth, valued her privacy above some relationships, would defend a family member to her demise, and provided a smother’s love to sons, a daughter-in law, and grandchildren.

Thanks for taking the time to read…eulogy, more than just an e word to come.

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11 comments

  1. Katie Clooney says:

    Beemie… I am so sorry for your loss. I think that sometimes it’s harder to handle the death of a loved one that you’ve had a complicated relationship with than one that you had a good one. I’ll keep you and your sis in my prayers.

    • Beemie says:

      Thanks so much. This has been so shocking. At times complicated can be a good thing, but I suppose not this time around.

  2. janey says:

    I am sorry Beems for your loss…..and for now having the strength to deal with the aftermath. Tough sometimes when relationships are strained. My sister and I sound a whole lot like you and yours…..
    Be strong……rant if you need to, we listen well….

    • Beemie says:

      Thanks so much ..I will cetainly deal…exhausted, Farewell for 5th graders next week, can’t miss it, but off tomorrow I will miss my first Farewell practice ever. They will survive.

  3. Leslie Anne Tarabella says:

    This is so sad, and I’m so sorry you are having to go through this. I’m glad you have a large family to help each other through the next few weeks and months, sure to be full of adjustments and varied emotions.

    • Beemie says:

      Thank you for your kind words. I have cried so much over the last few days that I may be out of tears. I am fortunate to have a large family, together we are stronger.

  4. Kelly L McKenzie says:

    Oh, Beemie. I am so very sorry for your loss. While I just recently “met” you, that photo of I.T. in the striped sweater speaks volumes. My mom had a complicated relationship with her late sister and I have an inkling of what you’ve gone through. Sending you a jumbo hug and sincere wishes that you continue to gather strength from your family.

  5. Maureen says:

    I am so very sorry to hear of Susan’s passing…we went to school together and we best buddies…we had a lot in common and believe it or not I have been searching for her for quite a while….may memories fill your broken heart and know I loved her too….may she RIP

    • Beemie says:

      Dear Maureen…thank you so much for reading and for seeking out Susan. Although it is too late for a heart to heart with her, know that Susan often told wonderful stories about the antics with her school friends. I am sure you were one of them. I am touched by your comment and thank you for your condolence.

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